It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize