Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
