Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
