I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
