But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
