I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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