I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
