"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
