We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
