I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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