There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
honey bunches of taint.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
