I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
