Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
