Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
