You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
