Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
