She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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