2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I could fuck to npr.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
