I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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