I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
