well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I think people are normalizing furries
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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