Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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