if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize