Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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