Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He kissed a someone with a penis
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
