who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
