Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Lo siento on account of my penis...
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Randomize