i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...