Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
