The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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