just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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