like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
