Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
