it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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