How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
