Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
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Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
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Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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