i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
