So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks