Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
