i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
