Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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