Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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