I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
