So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I need to sanitize my soul.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
