We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
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