I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize