i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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