hell yes lets make some ravioli
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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