she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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