he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
