I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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